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    Journal Entry: Mon May 12, 2008, 9:37 AM
    • Mood: Irritated
    You know, I'm really quite tired of scams people run. Do these phrases sound familiar?

    "Results not typical"
    "Simulated imagery"
    "Just pay shipping and handling"
    "Based on consumer perception"
    "...may apply"
    "100% money-back guarantee"

    "Free" no longer means free. It's just a word people stick in to get your attention. It's instantly followed up with "just pay shipping." I love that, "Free, just pay." Some logic, huh? Allow me to do some spin-doctor decoding.

    "Results not typical" is corporate speak for, "You're not going to look like this regardless of how much you use our product."
    "Simulated imagery" is corporate speak for, "Our product sucks and does nothing, so we had to make up some photos just to have something to show you."
    "Based on consumer perception" is corportate speak for, "Good thing for psychological placebos! Even though there are no verifiable differences, at least the consumers seem to think there are!"
    "...may apply" is corporate speak for "...will apply."
    "100% money-back guarantee" is corporate speak for, "Sure, we'll refund the purchase price, but we're not refunding your shipping and handling charges, which is where we make our money anyway, because we inflate it about 10X."
    * is a corporate catch-all that pretty much means, "Forget EVERYTHING we just said, because here's a conditional statement that nullifies our previous statement which was made only to get your attention."

    It seems to be nothing but scam after scam, and they are masters at what they do. They craft their words very carefully so that you will interpret them a certain way, but when you find the product does not work as advertised, they cannot be pinned down to it. "Well, what was SAID was this, but what you interpreted was that." They're very crafty so they can never be caught directly.

    For example, Lipozene, a weight-loss product (which, if you look at the fine print, says consumers lost an average of 3.86 lbs over an 8 week period. Honestly, 3.86 lbs over eight weeks? That's just so ridiculous, it's nothing. That alone could be water weight. In other words, it does virtually nothing) has an announcer that says, "Best of all, participants were not asked to change their daily lives!" Well, now, that doesn't mean they didn't change their daily lives. All they said was that participants were not asked to change their daily lives. But they know you're going to interpret it as, "People took this product and didn't do any dieting or exercise and still lost weight." They do this on purpose. Lipozene also has a 30-day money-back guarantee, yet it took the participants in the study 8 weeks to lose even just 3 lbs. Interesting how that time frame works, isn't it?

    So after 30 days, here are your options at this point: Pay to have it shipped back and get refunded for the price of the bottle, but eat the shipping and handling charges where they have already made their money off you, or just keep it and avoid the hassle of shipping it back altogether. Either way, the company's beaten you at this point. From the moment you place your order, the company has beaten you. And this isn't just Lipozene, it's anyone, everyone. Lipozene's just a convenient example.

    How many of you are familiar with the scam of buying something for a low price, but shipping and handling is twice as high as the "great value" you're getting for the product in question? "Buy this for $.99 (S+H $15)"

    How about buying one and getting one free, but you have to pay separate shipping and handling? You get one product for $.99, plus $15 S+H, and you get another one FREE (just pay separate $15 S+H). So now your fantastic deal of a $.99 product has been jacked up to $30.99 Some deal, huh? And what other motivation would they have for shipping the two products separately when they could just as easily ship them in the same box if not to make extra cash off you? Oh, but it's free!

    Ah, I just get so, so sick of the ridiculous crap out there. It's just one con job after another. I trust no companies these days! I've made it a point to instantly read the fine print in all commercials and webpages just to see what con jobs they're pulling, and I instantly scan for the qualifying asterisk. Everything out there is geared on screwing the consumer, one way or another. Remember that!

    --------
    NEW POLL!

    If you were cast in a movie, would you rather play the main hero or the main villain?

    For me, personally, I think playing a villain would be a lot of fun. It's so opposite of my real personality, but I can have such a creepy smile when I want to. Playing a hero would be a lot of fun, too, but villains get so much more freedom! I suppose it ultimately depends on the hero or villain role in question, but I guess I'd choose villain :) I'd love to play both roles, though!

    Vote here: [link]

    Poll results are always confidential, so privacy should never be a concern for you when voting in any of my polls. Thanks for voting!


    It's never too late to check out past polls and vote! Take a peek at previous polls here: [link]

    Devious Comments

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    ~LovelyLocks:iconLovelyLocks: May 12, 2008, 12:32:31 PM
    Good stuff Cheska!! :clap:
    It's great to have you checking up on all of this stuff! :3

    I know it sounds silly, but I get annoyed at the weight loss/exercise products TV advertisments, because they are so sexualized. I mean, your losing weight, not filming a porno!! XD

    --
    Can we please watch the "Swin Pronzs"?

    "Fuck me, I love Keats. There once was a young woman from Ealing, Who had a particular feeling. She lay on her back, And opened her crack, And pissed all over the ceiling!" ~ Daniel Cleaver
    *chesney:iconchesney: May 12, 2008, 1:13:31 PM
    Yeah, and it's not men putting pressure on women to lose weight (although men are convenient scapegoats). It's actually women putting pressure on women to lose weight. You never see a guy telling women to use a diet pill, only other women. Any time a guy sells a diet pill, he's usually selling it to other guys and is more promoting muscle building rather than weight loss. There's this one pill, Dexatrim, and their new slogan is "Get Dexappeal!" or something like that. It shows this guy and girl dancing, and the girl looks to the camera and says, "Ladies, don't let anyone tell you differently! Guys love a girl with Dexappeal!" Now, keep in mind, she says what she says, but what she implies is that men want THIN women. First of all, why in the hell would I trust a woman to tell me what a man wants? Secondly, I didn't realize all men were the exact same and all attracted to the exact same body type. I mean, God, give me a break. All these damn diet pills do is prey on people's insecurities and it's disgusting. It's the same way with things like Enzyte for men. For women, it's diet pills; for men, it's penis pills. Way too much stock is put in both, but as long as people are insecure with it, the media will keep hyping it to make a buck. -_-

    Honestly, though, lipozene is probably the worst because they say, "If you're overweight, it's not your fault!" Well, that's bullshit. For a good 90% of the people, it IS their own fault. Now, I'm sorry to say it, but it's true, and honestly, the first step to fixing it is admitting it IS your fault, because the sooner you realize it's your fault, the sooner you realize you're in control over the situation. The way they put it is like, "Fate just dealt you a bad hand, poor you. There's nothing you can do to change it except take Lipozene. Good thing we're selling it!" It's crazy. Another thing they do is pretend like diet and exercise aren't the key to weight loss. They promise this miracle pill that will help you lose weight (of course, they act like the weight will just fall off rapidly even though the fine print says an average of 3.86 lbs was lost over 8 fucking weeks) and they act like you don't have to do anything, no dieting, no exercise. If someone's not willing to diet and exercise or put in the effort required, then they honestly don't deserve to lose the weight, IMO. But, whatever. I should get off my tirade for now.

    --
    Chinese definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
    Programmer's definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and getting different results.
    ~LovelyLocks:iconLovelyLocks: May 12, 2008, 10:55:33 PM
    lmfao~~ Dexappeal?? are you serious?? the word itself sounds completely and utterly ridiculous! ^^; Argh!! yeah I totally hate it when women say what men want. Of course guys are different to each other. But the media always introduces them as sex crazed animals, it must be kinda unfair being a guy. I remember watching this episode of Ellen once, and she had this mad woman on there, who was a TV personality who did match making. She was asked what would be an advantage for a woman to attract a man... and guess what she said??!! She said something along the lines of "you must have straight hair"... seriously man, wtf??

    All those diet pills and stuff are such whimp outs. That lipozene thing is terrible!! I mean yeah, some people actually do have medical conditions that make it possible to gain excess amounts of weight, but it seems nowdays people are so focused on putting the blame on other people, even if there is no need to blame someone.
    It's so weird on the informercials how the announcer is trying to be you best friend. Over here we have so many skin care informercials that it's almost not funny.

    oh well~~ like you said, in the end, they're just trying to make a buck. :P

    --
    Can we please watch the "Swin Pronzs"?

    "Fuck me, I love Keats. There once was a young woman from Ealing, Who had a particular feeling. She lay on her back, And opened her crack, And pissed all over the ceiling!" ~ Daniel Cleaver
    *chesney:iconchesney: May 13, 2008, 2:59:21 AM
    That's very true, about the blame. People get so defensive that you're right, even if there's no need to blame, people will still instantly pass the buck. The straight hair thing is hilarious, actually, because if you look at why perms were invented, or why there are "volumizing" and "curl defining" styling aids and curling irons, you just laugh in the face of that idiot. Did Ellen put her in her place? If people started treating other people like individuals instead of like groups, people could get a lot farther. I like what I like because it's who I am, not because I'm a woman. And other people like what they like because it's who they are, not because of their age, sex, race, religion, what-the-hell-ever. It's kinda funny, though, you know, because you see so many women telling other women what men want, but you don't really see guys telling other guys what women want nearly as much.

    --
    Chinese definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
    Programmer's definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and getting different results.
    ~RICEA42991:iconRICEA42991: May 13, 2008, 9:05:50 AM
    You forgot also the internet lol "Try this free program" and when you do it's just a trial and they try to stick in their program that always like 29.99 or more grrr :rage:
    *chesney:iconchesney: May 13, 2008, 11:00:16 AM
    plus adware and spam and crap... everything's a con!

    --
    Chinese definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
    Programmer's definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and getting different results.
    ~LovelyLocks:iconLovelyLocks: May 13, 2008, 11:26:16 PM
    I'm not neccissarily sure if Ellen put her in her place, but they just disagreed on a lot of things. I totally agree with the people judging people by groups thing. I had an argument with one of my mates today, she's staunch aethiest and was telling me that half the priests/popes/whatever that exist are pedophiles. And I told her that I thought that it was an incorrect statement. It's funny... at first she seems to be so open and welcoming to other people, but she is also one of the most close minded and unwordly people I've ever met. ^^;
    Oh well, nobody's perfect~!! :D

    And it's so true abot the guys not giving other guys advice on what women want... what a strange strage world this is... ^^;

    --
    Can we please watch the "Swin Pronzs"?

    "Fuck me, I love Keats. There once was a young woman from Ealing, Who had a particular feeling. She lay on her back, And opened her crack, And pissed all over the ceiling!" ~ Daniel Cleaver
    *chesney:iconchesney: May 14, 2008, 7:37:21 AM
    lol, well, there are the few who get all the media attention, so of course it seems like that's all there is in the priest world. It's a shame that it only takes a few to ruin a whole :/ I think people who are generally unaccepted in the world (such as atheists or homosexuals or what have you) who require other people to be open-minded enough to accept them as they are are actually pretty close-minded themselves, but I think they develop that as a defense mechanism. It's ironic how that works!

    --
    Chinese definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
    Programmer's definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and getting different results.
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